Add to Your Toolbox - Stress Management Coping Strategies (8 min read)
These times call on us to explore different ways of coping with stress.
Building your own toolbox is a worthwhile activity.
With the rise in content about how to cope with stress and anxiety during COVID-19 you might begin considering if the content market on this topic is saturated, that’s not the case... yet! Here’s why. Yes, there is an increase in articles, podcasts, videos, and social media discussion on stress and anxiety, but it’s reflective of the fact that we are all experiencing heightened levels at the moment. Learning how to recognize good and unhealthy stress is worthy of conversation, and it’s also different for each of us. We are unique, and how we experience stress and anxiety ranges, so too do the approaches we adopt to manage our stress. What works for one person may not fit for someone else, there is no single answer. However, hope is not lost, there are a series of different and professionally recommended techniques that will help you find your combination of stress and anxiety busting tools. Your work is to explore, find, and try a combination of techniques that will help you work with what you are feeling, and not against it.
It’s helpful for each of us to continue to explore ideas because it might just be that one further article you read, or that podcast you listen to, or webinar you take part in, that gives you a new or renewed perspective that helps. At the moment something clicks in a way that it hasn’t before, and you find the keys to unlock how to cope and heal some of your own unmet stress and anxiety. With that in consideration, to further support you on your exploration, Dr Viktoriya Magid, our Managing Director of Self Actualization Programs shares more ideas to help you cope with the challenges of COVID-19 .
5 More Stress Management Techniques to Help During COVID-19.
1. Acknowledge and Accept Your Feelings
Frequently, when faced with a crisis, we are told to “get it together”, “buck up”, “carry on” and “don’t worry about what you can’t control”. Truth is, on their own these are unhelpful suggestions that can lead to further inability to process the complex feelings that are impacting most of us to various degrees at this time. Denying these feelings can lead to physical pain, insomnia, chronic stress, increased anxiety and irritability, just to name a few.
What technique can you apply? Begin by acknowledging and allowing your feelings to be. For example, “I’ve felt very anxious lately. A lot is changing and I have no idea how this situation will impact me in the future. It’s normal to have anxiety during such a stressful time. I’m sure I’m not alone.”
2. Avoid Catastrophizing
An extreme alternative to shutting off our feelings entirely is what psychologists call catastrophizing, a type of distorted thinking that tends to exacerbate anxiety. Catastrophizing occurs when we predict that things will turn out terribly without much evidence towards such a conclusion. For example, you might begin to feel convinced that you will get fired from your job as a result of the Covid-19-induced recession, despite being reassured that your job is not at risk at this time. While this outcome may be a possibility at some point, it is not a certainty, or your reality today.
What technique can you apply? Some questions to ask yourself to help you keep your fortune-telling self in check are: “If I was a scientist reporting about this to the public, would I be predicting the same thing with the complete certainty? If not, what would I say?”, “What is the evidence for this outcome?”, “What is the best case scenario, worst case scenario, and the most likely case scenario?”, “Even if the worst did happen, could I live through that?”, “What would I say to a friend if she/he was telling me this?”. The goal of this exercise is to balance the likelihood of the worst-case scenario with evidence to the contrary and eventually see the situation from a more objective point of view. Become aware of the story you are writing in your mind and recognize you are your own author of how you see and experience your world. You choose which words to write.
3. Control What You Can
Much of the time we lament the things we cannot control only to end up not having enough mental energy to think through the things we are able to control. There is little we can do to change when the pandemic ends, when the quarantine will be lifted, how many people it will affect (other than doing your part to comply with social distancing guidelines), how businesses and services will adjust, and how much money you will end up losing - or making, and so on.
What technique can you apply? Instead of spending precious mental energy contemplating these general and wide issues, I recommend asking yourself more specifically: “Is there anything I can do about this right now?”.
If the answer is “yes”, then write down what it is, and do it as soon as you can. Perhaps, it is to consult a financial advisor, or discuss mortgage payments with the bank, or negotiate rent payments with landlords. Whatever the action steps are, you bring clarity to the reality of right now. Often the anxiety of anticipation can be greater than the anxiety we experience when we actually execute something. The sooner you act and execute the sooner you get into sorting out the mess or resolving the issue causing you concern. Even with the really difficult responses you receive, by acting you create a sense of ease in your mind, and it moves you into a space of being able to let go of the decisions that are out of your control. You then get to decide how you respond, what decisions you can or need to make as a result. Rather than using up physical and mental energy resisting or fighting, you move your mind into thinking of solutions for the things you can control.
To work on moving your worries from the driving seat into back seat, ask yourself this question: “What can I control within the confinements of this situation?”. “What choices do I have in finding a solution here?” The answer might be nothing right now, it might be a case of waiting, which can be uncomfortable, but it is one choice and one answer. Or the answer might come to you by making daily habit changes, changing payments for services, or reshuffling commitments due to other critical financial payments. You might find you need to cancel your gym subscription, but replace it with a workout regimen that is free using online videos instead, or taking long walks locally, or learning how to practice diaphragmatic breathing or meditation. Establishing a scheduled routine, adopting a consistent sleep/wake cycle, eating regular meals, and exercising can all help to establish a semblance of familiarity and consistency, which cannot be underrated about how much this can help during these particularly turbulent times of chaos and uncertainty. Putting effort into controlling what you can, and letting go of what you cannot, will help you to feel more in control and boost your sense of wellbeing.
4. Have Perspective
Speaking of distorted thinking, another common type is called “mental filter.” Mental filter occurs when we focus on one (or a few) aspect(s) of a situation and filter out or ignore other aspects. For example, when giving a talk to a group of associates at work, and one person said something mildly critical, you obsess about that criticism and ignore all of the positive/neutral feedback you otherwise received. Mental filtering makes us lose perspective and can even lead to depression and anxiety.
What technique can you apply? It is important to work on recognizing when you are engaging in distorted thinking and to develop a more balanced perspective on the situation. In this case, a more accurate thought would be “While I have some things to improve upon, overall it seems my talk went well”. With regards to the pandemic, you might think to yourself “While my financial situation has been negatively impacted and it’s tough to stay home and be isolated from my friends and loved ones, I know I will find a way through because I have done in the past during challenging times, or I still have my savings to fall back on and my health is good. While this isn’t an ideal situation, it is far worse for some people and I have some things that are going well for me”.
5. Make Meaning
In technique No.1, I shared how to accept what you cannot control, and work on controlling what you can. There is more to learn and you can take this a step further. In his influential book “A Man’s Search for Meaning,” Viktor Frankl, a psychiatrist who survived the concentration camp at Auschwitz, reflects on the importance of meaning in our lives and its key role in surviving challenging situations and persevering in the face of obstacles. Making meaning of the current situation could make all the difference in how you weather this crisis.
What technique can you apply? Seeing this as an opportunity to grow, to learn new skills, to become creative in the use of telehealth or working from home, or using the time to build a stronger bond with your kids, or to learn how to be more compassionate with yourself because doing all the things you once did is simply not possible at the moment. Perhaps, you are struggling with isolation – this may afford you the opportunity, you otherwise would not have considered, to explore a new creative venture, to join a virtual group based on your hobbies, or to do the self reflective work of delving into your own emotional and mental health, maybe this will be the time you reassess your career desires and choices. How many times have you said in the past, “if I only I could just stay at home for a bit and figure all this out?” This may afford you the opportunity to finally learn another language, or read that book you’ve been wanting to, or start to grow your own garden. See this situation not as something to weather, but rather as something to make the most of. This can be a powerful perspective-change that results in lasting positive shifts, despite a few inevitable struggles. “Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain”, is a well-known quote. Learning to dance in the rain without disowning our difficult feelings is the art of resiliency, and it is something we can each learn. Hard times come and go in life, that is a fact of being human, but we can learn new ways and adopt skills to cope when those tough times come and know that we can come through the storm. This too, shall pass.
Be Well, Pursue Thoughtfulness
Birch Cove is not a medical or therapy based business, we do not offer guarantees of any kind. We are not responsible for the well-being of businesses or individuals that read, watch, or hear our content, or take part in sessions, or use our services or the services we highlight. Birch Cove and our Collective members are not responsible for the physical and mental health and well-being of individuals we interact with directly or indirectly. We work to share best practices that inspire healthy living and revitalize a quality of life. If you personally are feeling unwell seek professional medical advice, and follow the CDC guidelines as appropriate.